


Neighbors

by BlueTeamSucks



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Modern AU, Multi, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-05
Updated: 2015-04-05
Packaged: 2018-03-21 10:15:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3688422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueTeamSucks/pseuds/BlueTeamSucks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Washington's neighbor and his friends are kind of weird.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Neighbors

The sound of his wireless printer turning on was not something that Washington had expected to hear at seven PM. He looked up from his book in surprise, wondering if it had somehow broken while he was sitting across the room from it. He had wonderful luck with technology and wouldn’t put it past himself to somehow have destroyed it completely that last time he used it.

Swearing under his breath, Wash stood up and walked over to the printer as the whirring finally stopped. A piece of paper had been spat out onto the floor. Feeling utterly confused, Wash bent over to pick it up. Once he straightened up, Washington realized that he was holding the original “Can I has cheezburger” meme printed out onto paper.

Washington laughed loudly when he figured out what was going on. One of his neighbors must have discovered that they had access to his new wireless printer and taken advantage of it. He rolled his eyes, still giggling a little. Wash set the paper down on the top of his printer and decided to go back to his book.

Right as he picked up his paperback, the printer turned on once again. A smile played on Wash’s lips as he walked back over, curious to see what it would be this time. This one finished printing much quicker, probably because it was a document instead of a picture. As soon as the paper was in his hands, it sucked up another piece and kept printing. Wash looked down at the still warm paper, wondering what it would be this time.

Horror filled Wash’s body as he read the words, “The Bee Movie Script.”

In a panic, Wash tried to cancel the action. His printer refused and a sinking feeling filled Wash’s gut. He ground his teeth together as he realized that he would need to go find whoever had done this.

Gripping the first page of the script, Wash quickly slipped on his shoes and walked out into the hall. He decided to go to the right first and knocked on his neighbor’s door.

South answered the door to Connie’s apartment, which wasn’t that surprising. She stared at Wash, looking extremely irritated. “What do you want?” She asked flatly.

“Are you the person who’s printing The Bee Movie Script to my printer?” Wash tried to keep the accusing tone out of his voice.

A grin split over South’s face. “No, but I wish that I was.”

With a sigh, Wash shook his head. “Goddammit. Thanks anyway, South.”

“Have fun with your Bee Movie problem,” South scoffed before shutting the door.

Wash turned to the apartment that was to the left of him. He hadn’t really ever talked to that neighbor. All he knew about Felix was that he was extremely attractive and had a couple of extremely attractive friends that were constantly at his place.

He knocked on the door and waited for an answer. A few seconds later, Felix opened the door with an innocent expression. Behind him stood a tall, shirtless, Asian guy with quite a few tattoos and an even taller guy with brown skin and dark hair that was tied back into a ponytail.

“Was this you?” Washington asked, trying not to smile as he held up the piece of paper in his hand.

Felix looked at it and immediately broke into a shit eating grin. “I was wondering when you’d come over.”

“Goddammit! Printer ink is fucking expensive!” Wash attempted to scowl, but couldn’t quite manage it with Felix laughing like that.

“Sorry, dude. I’ll stop it right now, hang on.” Felix ducked back into his apartment, leaving Wash alone with the other two guys.

“I’m Mako,” the guy with tattoos introduced himself.

“Washington. Wash for short.” The two of them shook hands and Wash tried to ignore the fact that he was still shirtless and pretty damn muscular.

The tallest of the three shook hands with Wash as well. “Locus,” was all he said.

Just as Washington was about to strike up an awkward conversation, Felix returned with five dollars and a package of Skittles in his hand. “Uh, sorry for using up your ink.” He handed the peace offering over to Wash with a sheepish expression on his face.

Wash chuckled at the gift, which helped Felix relax a little bit. “Thanks, Felix. Here, you can have this.” He shoved the Bee Movie script over at Felix. “No take backs.”

“Dammit!” Felix laughed, then waved goodbye to Washington. Wash nodded to them and headed back to his own apartment, unusually happy, even though there was a pile of papers on the floor underneath his printer.

~*~

Two weeks from the Bee Movie incident, Washington had only talked to Felix twice. Both times had been lighthearted and friendly. Wash was starting to like Felix and was trying to think up a way to have a longer conversation with him.

But on a Sunday morning after a night out with his friends, Felix was the last thing on Wash’s mind as he stumbled into the kitchen at nine AM. Groaning, he downed a couple of Advil and prayed that they would start working soon. The thought of food made him want to throw up, so he just pulled a bottle of gatorade from his fridge and started to sip at that. Wash was in the middle of swearing to never drink again as he walked into the living room and past his snake.

Just before he reached the couch, Wash froze. He slowly turned around to look down at the snake that was curled up on his floor. He did not own a snake.

Slowly, Wash inched around it. Once he was past the spot where it was chilling, he bolted for the door. He was pretty sure that Felix had mentioned having a pet snake once, so he was going to go to him first.

Wash didn’t even bother with shoes as he rushed out into the hallway. He frantically started knocking on the door, wincing at the noise. Why today of all days? All that Washington wanted to do right now was lay on the couch and be hungover.

The door finally opened and instead of looking down at Felix, Washington found himself staring up at Locus. Being suddenly so close to him allowed Wash to take in more details about his face. Locus had brown eyes, amazing cheekbones, and a strong jaw. A barely visible scar went over the bridge of his nose and Wash absently wondered how he had gotten it. Locus looked only slightly annoyed, but seemed mostly curious. “Can I help you?” He glanced Wash up and down, not even trying to be subtle.

“Is Felix home?” Wash asked, pretending that he wasn’t wearing only pajama bottoms.

Locus quirked an eyebrow and shook his head. “No. I’m housesitting.”

“Oh, shit,” Wash swore under his breath, then cleared his throat. “So, uh, does Felix happen to own a pet snake?”

Locus’s eyes widened in realization, then he scowled unhappily. “Great,” he muttered, sarcastically.

“It’s on my living room floor,” Wash told him, turning to lead Locus into his apartment. Locus followed with a long, frustrated sigh.

The two of them walked into Wash’s apartment, ready to grab the snake. Wash pointed at the spot on the ground where the snake should be. “It’s right… here…”

“It’s gone.”

“I noticed.”

For the next hour, Wash and Locus ran around his apartment, looking for Felix’s stupid pet snake. After a while, Wash gave up in favor of sitting on the couch and staring longingly at his bottle of Advil. “I’m too hungover for this,” he announced as Locus looked behind his Xbox for the third time.

Locus sighed. “When I agreed to housesit for two days, I didn’t think that it would be this hard. Yesterday, his huge TV fell over. Luckily, I was right there to catch it. With my face.”

Wash snorted at that image. “Just be glad that- Holy shit!” He had been interrupted in the middle of his sentence by something cold touching his ankle. Wash leaped up onto his couch, away from whatever it had been.

Felix’s snake slithered out from under the couch and Locus immediately bent over and scooped it up. The snake curled around his wrist, blissfully unaware of the trouble that it had caused.

“Thanks for the help, Washington. I don’t know if I would’ve survived if Felix found out that I lost his pet,” Locus rolled his eyes at the thought and Wash nodded at him from up on the couch.

“Anytime, man.”

~*~

The wall to Washington’s bedroom practically shook. At first Wash was afraid that Felix was having sex, but once he took his earbuds out he realized that Felix was just playing music really loud.

The new Fall Out Boy album blasted in Felix’s room and Wash knew that he wouldn’t be getting any sleep unless he did something about it. With a groan, Wash got out of bed. He decided not to bother with putting a shirt on because if Felix was up this late, he probably wouldn’t care about Wash’s appearance.

So Wash shuffled over to Felix’s place, bleary eyed and slightly curious about why the music was so loud. Wash knocked loudly enough to be heard over the song and hoped that Felix hadn’t passed out while listening to music or something.

The door creaked open and Felix stared up at Wash, looking just as disheveled as he felt. It didn’t take Wash very long to notice that Felix was wearing only boxers, which made Wash the one with more clothes on. “Uh, hi. I’ll turn it down a bit, sorry.” He grinned sleepily, not looking sorry at all.

“You okay?”

The question seemed to throw Felix off guard. “What? Oh, yeah. I’m fine. I actually got into a… Never mind, I don’t want to bother you.”

Wash cocked his head to the side, suddenly interested. “I’m willing to listen as long as you have some form of caffeine.”

Felix smiled. “Sure. Red bull okay?”

“Of course.”

Wash stepped into Felix’s apartment. It was a lot like his, only slightly messier. Felix walked off to the kitchen to grab the drinks and turn off the music while Wash sat down on the couch, which was pushed against a different wall than his was.

Felix soon joined Wash on the couch and handed him an already open Red Bull. Wash hummed in appreciation and took the drink without a word, waiting patiently for Felix to start talking.

“So, I’m dating Locus, you know that right?”

Wash shook his head, only slightly surprised. Felix just shrugged. “Well, ya know. But recently we also started dating Mako, so it’s the three of us.”

That made Washington raise an eyebrow. He was shocked by the news for just a moment. Looking back on it, it was pretty obvious. Wash kicked himself for not noticing sooner, usually he was pretty good at telling about that sort of thing.

Felix just continued with his story, not pausing for an explanation. “It’s been like that for about six months and we kinda had our first fight and it’s really getting to me. It was over something totally stupid too! I forgot to get gas in Locus’s car after using it and it kinda blew up.” Felix sighed in exasperation and flopped down on the couch, resting his head in Wash’s lap.

“How long ago was the fight?” Wash asked, absently running a hand through Felix’s hair. It was three in the morning and it looked like neither of them had boundaries right now.

“‘Bout six hours,” Felix said, mumbling a bit. He closed his eyes, seeming to be enjoying Wash playing with his hair.

“Well, I’ve done polyamorous relationships before and you guys need to know that communication is the key. And try not to go to bed mad.”

“So you’re saying just to talk them?” Felix cracked open his eyes to stare up at Wash.

Wash hummed and nodded as he carded his fingers through Felix’s hair. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

Felix shut his eyes again and smiled to himself. “Thanks for the advice, Wash.”

“No problem,” Wash muttered before he dozed off.

“Asshole, wake up.” Felix bounced on the couch, next to where Washington was slumped over.

Wash groaned and looked over at Felix, blinking the sleep out of his eyes. “What is it?” His neck was immensely sore and his back ached, but Felix looked happy enough that it was contagious.

Grinning, Felix nudged Wash’s arm playfully. “I listened to you and did a group call with Locus and Mako this morning. Everything is fixed now, thanks to you.”

Wash smiled fondly back at Felix. “Glad that I could help.”

~*~

Washington patted his back pocket to make sure that his car keys and wallet were there. Once he was sure that he had everything, Wash opened his door to make a run to the grocery store. Instead of finding the floor in front of his door, Wash found Mako completely passed out on the ground. Oddly enough, he was still shirtless, giving Wash a good view of another shark tattoo and some writing in Chinese.

“Um, you okay there?” Wash nudged Mako with his foot, hoping that he wasn’t dead.

Luckily, Mako groaned.

Wash breathed a sigh of relief at the noise. He looked up and down the hallway, seeing no sign of Felix or Locus. Wash stepped out of his apartment and over Mako, who was still just laying there. He rapped on Felix’s door and waited a full minute before deciding that there would be no response.

He turned back to Mako, wondering what the hell he was going to do with him. After a moment of thought, Wash decided on keeping Mako at his place for the night. “Alright, let’s get you inside.”

Wash bent down and pulled one of Mako’s arms around his shoulder. Mako stirred slightly, managing out a “What?”

“It’s Washington, Felix’s neighbor. You’re really drunk,” Wash explained as he pulled Mako toward his couch.

“Oh. You’re that pretty guy.”

Feeling the blush creeping up his cheeks, Wash ducked his head. “Thanks, I guess.’’

“Locus and Felix like you. I think you’re pretty, too. I really like the freckles,” Mako announced loudly.

Washington groaned as he lowered Mako onto his couch. “Okay. I’m gonna get you some water, ‘cause you’re really drunk.”

Mako didn’t respond. Instead, he just flopped back on the couch and slung a tattooed arm over his eyes. Wash didn’t mean to stare, he really didn’t. It’s just that Mako was very attractive and Washington was very gay. It just couldn’t be helped.

Wash’s eyes traced over the several tattoos. He wondered why there seemed to be a theme with the sharks. The word “Redemption” was spelled out over his collarbones. Wash was struck with the sudden urge to run his mouth over the tattoos, but quickly cut himself off before he could dwell on it.

He rushed to the kitchen to grab Mako his cup of water. When he came back, Mako’s arm was still over his eyes, but Wash swore that his lips were upturned in a slight smirk. “Um, I need to go to the grocery store, but, I’ll… Uh, I’ll be back in an hour.”

With that, Washington turned and all but ran out the door. Once he was out of his house, Wash smacked himself in the forehead. “Stupid, stupid. I’m an idiot, holy shit.”

The whole time he was at the store, Wash’s mind was on what Mako had said. Something about Locus, Felix, and him all liking Wash? Or was it that they all thought he was pretty? Wash had been pretty flustered at that point and he wasn’t sure if he was remembering everything correctly.

When Wash walked back through his apartment door with his arms loaded with groceries, the couch was empty. He froze for a second, then realized that Mako had probably left. He set the bags down on his kitchen counter, before noticing that Mako was sitting at his kitchen table with his head in his hands.

“You still drunk?” Wash asked him as he started sorting through his groceries.

“Yeah,” Mako responded. He looked a little pale, like he was feeling sick.

“You can sleep on the couch if you want.”

“You sure?”

“I wouldn’t have offered if I wasn’t.”

Mako got up from the table, the chair he had been sitting in scraping against the floor. It was then that Wash noticed that Mako was now wearing one of his shirts, which managed to fluster him even more than when he hadn’t been wearing any shirt.

~*~

Washington heard the hushed whispering at the door long before there was actually a knock. He waited patiently for whoever it was to make up their minds. It took them two minutes before there was finally a hesitant knock.

“Hello?” Wash asked once he opened the door to see Felix, Locus, and Mako all crowded on his doorstep.

“Hey, Wash!” Felix grinned, his cheeks already pink. “We were wondering if you wanted to have a movie night with us tonight?”

Locus rolled his eyes before adding, “As a date.”

“That’s a pretty important part of the question, Felix,” Mako teased before Locus got the chance to shush him.

Wash smiled at all of them. “Sure. What movie are we watching?”

Felix laughed. “Hah! I told you guys! You were wrong to ever doubt me.”

“We never doubted you, Felix. We just said that…”

As Mako and Felix started bickering, Locus rolled his eyes at them. “We’re watching Galaxy.”

Washington grinned, wondering what he was getting himself into.


End file.
